Clean machine

Today I made an extra special stop at the car wash. I let the washer hut do the outside and I vacuumed the inside. There is something about a clean car that somehow give you a sense of hope (or something I cannot put my finger on). It feels like..."yes, I'm on top of things, my car is clean", or it feels like "yes, now I will be proud when someone looks at or steps into my car". I feel as though with my clean car, I am in control of my life.

Here are my thoughts with a newly cleaned car:

• I will NEVER let it get messy again


• My kids with NEVER eat in the car again


• I will stay on top of the crap going in and crap going out of the car


• I will get the outside cleaned more often.

Then...you know the story...reality sets in. That one big day out with the kids, where a lot of junk gets in, you hurriedly throw food at them between events, and you forget to remind them to pick up their junk...and then it is back, right where it began needing a good clean out. The positive of this, is that you get to experience the euphoric feelings (see above) again...and the process repeats itself. I do hold the hope that "one day" my car will remain 'kept' consistently, and that all my socks will consistently have mates. A girl can dream can't she?

Hit-or-miss

I have been hit-or miss with my posting recently...and I'm cool with that. It's usually the next morning when I realize I missed and then sometimes I'll forget and miss again. On Sunday I broke with my normal gratitude session and I'm cool with that too...even though I am extremely grateful for an extremely long list of things...I just plain forgot.

So what else is hit or miss for me?

1. Scheduling on a calendar so that I don't double book events



2. Avoiding candy



3. Saying yes when I really wanted to say no



4. Getting frustrated



5. Keeping my car clean



6. Straightening the house



7. Losing socks



8. Feeling confident



9. Exercising



10. Staying focused on the task at hand



11. Being on time

Those are just a few of the hit-or-miss things on my list...and again, I'm cool with these. These make me human. These make me have goals to strive for. These actually make me laugh about myself and for that...I am grateful. And oh by the way, as I am oft to say, I'm doing the best that I can with the resources I have!

Morning visions

I was up at the crack of dawn this morning sifting through piles of winter gear. It turns out the kids have grown AND we've lost some essentials for snow play. I just sent my kids out looking a bit 'patched together' to go skiing with Dad. Actually, Dad will be in the lodge reading while the kids are in ski lessons. I am not sure the kids are really keen on this, it almost felt like I was sending them off to some torture program.

Whenever dad adventures take place I am a little on edge (for the kids). I might be generalizing a bit, but, dad's attention to details can be a little off and so sometimes they believe the kids will 'get by' with whatever is in the car. It is TRUE that they will live, however, with some planning, the kids may also have a good time and not whine as much. So, I COULD HAVE let my husband get the kids together for this skiing "adventure" but I'm not sure if they'd have been warm OR had essential equipment like say, socks. Also, I know how uncomfortable it can be to be cold and skiing and then hot and skiing and then back to cold, so it is nice to consider this when dressing the kids. So the vision I'm left with is: my daughter wearing MY ski coat, not-very-waterproof pants with three layers of under-wear, my turtleneck, my thick shirt, my ski socks, and snow boots that do not match the rest of the get up. My son is wearing a coat that is last year's and is too small (almost 3/4 length sleeves), with a shell underneath to hopefully cover the part of his arms that the coat doesn't cover and my husband's ski socks, his boots are hand-me-downs that again, aren't that stylish. It was an ordeal and a vision as they slogged (because they had all of this mismatched gear on) to the car.

Another "dad adventure" worry is that I believe mom's have the ability to be a little more patient especially when there are complicating factors - like ski boots, hats, gloves, snotty noses etc. So, I did a little prayer of patience for both my husband and the kids. I know all told that they will be fine, but it is always a mom's/wife's wish that everyone is enjoying themselves with the least amount of hassle as possible. It's just in our DNA to want that! I'm just sayin'.

Photo is from this morning's sun rise that I witnessed.

First of many...

I just got home from my first of many holiday parties for2009. I love that I have friends to laugh with and enjoy each other's company. It makes me feel warm and cozy inside. Now I will retire to my warm and cozy bed! Bon Soir

Flash forward

I've had two "visions" of my daughter's future self one good and one notso. I'll start with the notso so I can end on a positive note.

Today her hair wasn't up to standard (according to her). So she worked and worked, and huffed and puffed, but to no avail. In the process of this salon treatment, she started treating everyone else in the house like we were such a bother and started the silent treatment with me. I don't do silent treatment and bullying. So...unfortunately sometimes I'd "match" her temperament which probably isn't the best. Anyway, this is what I'm imagining teenage years to look like, but I'm hoping I'm wrong. I kissed her head and said I love you and have a good day. Silence. So...what do I do...threaten...isn't that nice? I say, if you cannot figure out how to treat me nicely perhaps that special playdate this afternoon will have to be cancelled. To which she turned with tears in her eyes and says...Its just that my HAIR WON'T WORK...and she turns and walks to the bus. Holy tomato, I can't wait until zits and bras and the such enter the picture.

OK now the good future...my daughter is doing a PowerPoint presentation for school. My power point skills stagnated circa 2000 when I did my last "professional" one, but I can hold my own. So, I was prepared to help her out. Well, it turns out that my daughter is a whiz at PPT and in fact can add sound, and special features like slides fading in and out and the such. She also seems to have pretty good design skills and this presentation is shaping up to be very professional. The problem is that it is a bit 'smoke and mirrors' at the moment because she is focusing more on the whiz bang than on the content. I am subtly trying to move her to the next slide she needs to make...but there is still some graphic, picture, highlighting etc to be done. I wish I could teach her the skill of doing a quick draft first of everything and then tarting it up later...just because we could be having a battle (see above) on the day before it is due. The positive of this is that I see that she is talented at design and her attention to detail is good...I believe both will be of benefit to her in the future...but please, my sweet child, can we get to the next slide?

And that is how my day started...AND I have a heart monitor on. I wonder if I should write a note that says...Dear Dr. Cardiologist, from 7:30-8:30 I was wrangling a preteen, so that huge spike in my heart-rate...that is normal!

Day is done...

Gone the sun...da-da-da, da-da-da, da-da-da... If you grew up a military kid you'd know the tune to this song. I never learned the words but I distinctly remember stopping at whatever hour it was that they were lowering the flags (if we were on base). You are to stand still and face the flags. Some of those traditions bring a warm feeling to my heart. Those rituals made you feel you were part of something, and it was always cool as a child to do things like say the Pledge of Allegiance or stop when you know you're supposed to and pay your respects to the flag.

Wow...I thought I had nothing to say this evening in my VERY LATE post...but I did and along with it, I have the feelings of nostalgia and fondness...how cool is that? Perhaps I should call it a day...AT EASE.

And on that note....Happy Birthday to my dear father, who provided me with the opportunity to experience said ritual! I love you!

Gratitude X 10

1. Christmas trees


2. Children decorating Christmas trees


3. Children dancing to Christmas music


4. Children singing Christmas music


5. Children reading Christmas books


6. Sparkly lights on Christmas trees


7. Children's Christmas "artwork" from year's past


8. Pictures of children on Santa's laps (especially the crying one)


9. Christmas shows


10. FINISHED WITH CHRISTMAS SHOPPING (98% at least there is always room for one more stocking stuffer)

PLEASE NOTE: I would not be saying any of this BEFORE Thanksgiving...there is a time and place for celebrating the season and if you could tell advertisers that, I'd be grateful!